Anthony Bordain The Poet


If you stop thinking how your tongue is going to envelope the Hollandaise that Tony is bout to eat into its warm passionate and fiery embrace,and take a listen to what Tony is saying,you are going to realize he’s a poet.It was a groundbreaking revelation,I discovered that when he was in Havana.He was bleeding a bit when the nervous barber gave him a shave,and he said something  like “I was blissfully unaware that in the world outside my head it was like carving a roast. A slaughterfest.” and something about the blood being rain or something.Whatever it was,it was fucking beautiful.And ever since then,I have been paying attention to everything he said.I was at some forum earlier when I was reading up on the Havana episode,these bunch of people were talking about the razor blade the nervous barber was using.They were so into it,talking about the diameters of the point of the blade and what not.Are you kidding me? Here is Tony making beautiful poetry,having his chin cut.And yeah sure that razor blade looks like a smart purchase.Here is a carefully compiled empirical evidence on why Tony is one of the greatest poets of our century.The crew should carry a notebook with them and start writing this shit down.

1. “You know you’re in Sweden

when you come across

something too damn practical for comment.”

2.“I lurched away

from the table after a few hours

feeling like Elvis in Vegas

– fat, drugged, and completely out of it.”

3.“It’s as if Japanese men,

all to aware that deep inside

they’d like to stomp Tokyo flat,

breathe fire,

and do truly terrible and

disgusting things to women,

have built themselves

the most beautiful of prisons

for their rampaging ids.

Instead of indulging their fantasies,

they focus on food,

or landscaping,

or the perfect cup of tea

— or a single slab of o-toro tuna

— letting themselves go only at

baseball games

and office parties”

And the thing is,he wasn’t one of those poets who talk about the sea and a bunch of mindless pseudo intellectual ramblings.They are legitimate beauty which makes sense.I mean,that is far more fascinating than the fucking diameter of the point of a razor blade


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